This week hit me hard in not having Sarah Rou; I have walked in a way through an emotional haze. I struggled with trying to find my footing, wondering why all of a sudden through normality playing a part in my life since Sarah’s death do I now struggle. I realized that it is through the normal rhythm of life that makes me catch my breath, the signs of her being a part of my life are few and when I do realize that I had a child in a way, three weeks of her being absent does not do it justice. I feel that it has been years that stretch between the memories of getting up every three hours, holding her and kissing the top of her forehead then having to place her still body in a tiny box. It is weird to think that is has only been two months to the day when this little life entered this big world to play such a great role in mine and all her hear her story.
Right now, I guess I am learning how to live again, and in that I was pointed out by a friend needs to involve writing out my life here again for all to continue dancing along with me to my HAPPY DANCE. So, in a way I am back, don’t worry though you have not missed much in the last week or two, I am working my way through school work for my deadline of graduating in December so- WOOHOO! Also, trying to get down on paper what I would love HWR to look like and such cause changes are going to happen this year mainly in where there going to live and such. I am excited to be able to let you all know what that will look like in the future and again thank you for being pateint and continueing with me my life here in Haiti.
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2 comments:
I LOVE YOU!
it is strange to think how strong- a lifetimes worth of strong- an impact our children have on our own lives- no matter how short their presence on earth. It amazes me still that a few days, a few weeks, a few months, can totally and completely change our world view. After they are gone it is like learning to walk on new feet.
Tentative and wobbly at first, but God extends his hand " Take my hand and walk where I lead". Isaiah 41:10
So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.
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